Friday, October 16, 2009

Ethan , Bristol: 2, Pleasure: 1

Last Meal: tuna grinder
Thoughts: This crap gave a new meaning to pain.It felt like my but was on fire.I'm glad its all over.

Thursday, September 24, 2009

Brian, Bristol: 4, Pleasure: 2

Last Meal: spinach omelette
Thoughts: Continuation of earlier. Smallish, maybe 6 inches max, but extremely slow coming out. It took like 15 to 20 seconds of open-sphincter time, which was rather exhausting.

Brian, Bristol: 5, Pleasure: 3

Last Meal: spinach omelette
Thoughts: Pushed out before it was really ready, but it's lunch time and I hate having interruptions.

Wednesday, September 23, 2009

Kirk, Bristol: 6, Pleasure: 1

Last Meal: Giant Turkey Leg
Thoughts: Messy remnants of culinary over-indulgence at the Big-E. I expected nothing less.

Scooter, Bristol: 4, Pleasure: 1

Last Meal: chili
Thoughts: firm but spicey. could smell the chili pepper spices. tough clean up. needed 2 baby wipes to finish off

Brian, Bristol: 4, Pleasure: 2

Last Meal: Pasta
Thoughts: Slight burning sensation, with a faint smell of garlic. Otherwise unremarkable.

Friday, September 18, 2009

Kirk, Bristol: 6, Pleasure: 3

Last Meal: Hamburger
Thoughts: Not sure what number to give this. It was neither a solid, nor a liquid. Very "Newtonian-fluid-like". Left a nice smear going down for Brian's viewing enjoyment during his next bathroom visit.

Wednesday, September 16, 2009

Kirk, Bristol: 3, Pleasure: 5

Last Meal: Chicken Pizza
Thoughts: About as good as taking a crap can get. Minimal pushing, mild stench, neutral ph, one wipe.

Tuesday, September 15, 2009

Scooter, Bristol: 4, Pleasure: 4

Last Meal: Chicken
Thoughts: This one curled like a monkeytail and left streaks as it was being flushed. The bowl looks like a marble cake now.

Kirk, Bristol: 5, Pleasure: 1

Last Meal: Veggie Platter
Thoughts: This crap was actually a miracle of human excrement that I believe spanned ALL the numbers of the Bristol chart end to end. It was...horrible.

Monday, September 14, 2009

Brian, Bristol: 3, Pleasure: 2

Last Meal: Pasta
Thoughts: Not exactly a sausage, smaller and more rabbit-like, but with the consistency of a 3. Strange odor, not necessarily bad, just....different.

Friday, September 11, 2009

Brian, Bristol: 4, Pleasure: 1

Last Meal: buffalo chicken sandwich
Thoughts: Sticky mess. Required around a dozen wipes to approach something resembling cleanliness. Massive brown streak waiting for the next person to use the ladies room. Ha!

Brian, Bristol: 4, Pleasure: 2

Last Meal: turkey burger
Thoughts: After not pooping yesterday, I think my expectations were too high for this one.

Kirk, Bristol: 6, Pleasure: 2

Last Meal: Salami sandwich
Thoughts: Early turtle head indications put this one at a 4 or a high 3. That all changed in one explosive gush of soupy poopy. Neutral ph.

Thursday, September 10, 2009

Kirk, Bristol: 5, Pleasure: 2

Last Meal: Grilled Chicken Salad
Thoughts: "Soft blobs with clear-cut edges (passed easily)". That about covers it.

Wednesday, September 9, 2009

Kirk, Bristol: 3, Pleasure: 4

Last Meal: Steak
Thoughts: Super dense and sank faster than the titanic. Almost refused to break on the way down the hole, but a second flush did the trick. Clean one-wiper.

Brian, Bristol: 4, Pleasure: 5

Last Meal: rice+veggie stir fry
Thoughts: Above average girth. Unknown length, since it went straight down, but I estimate around 16 inches. Upon flush, it dissolved into a thousand tiny pieces. Rather awe-inspiring.

Tuesday, September 8, 2009

Brian, Bristol: 7, Pleasure: 1

Last Meal: Pasta
Thoughts: Mostly 7, occasionally hinting at a 6, but then returning back to "entirely liquid". Stench is still foul, but not room-clearingly so.

Brian, Bristol: 5, Pleasure: 1

Last Meal: Pasta
Thoughts: Created such a godawful stench that I had to cut it short just to get out of the bathroom.

Kirk, Bristol: 4, Pleasure: 3

Last Meal: Tuna Salad
Thoughts: Akin to shitting out a dehydrated kitchen sponge...expanded to twice it's original volume upon contact with the bowl water.